“Yeah traffic is bad here I can see that, and we’ve been
sitting in line here for awhile, so I can see why you might be in a hurry. Go
ahead, jump into the empty lanes that are closed up ahead. Yeah, I know, you
are so much more important than the rest of us, you’re the only one late for
work, I’m sure they’ll understand that at the end there and let you in front of
them.”
“Oh, so sorry, am I in your way? You want to get over? Yeah,
I see your lane is closed now, really inconvenient huh? The thing is, there was
a sign 200 feet back, you see it there? You see how it says ‘Left lanes closed
ahead’? Did you not notice? Oh, I can see how that might be hard. And it’s so
hard to see the big sign with the lights pointing to the right. And the 4 other
signs posted for the previous 2 miles warning you that the lane was going to be
closed. But I can see how why you didn’t figure it out until you got to the
cones closing the lane. But I don’t think I’m letting you in. Better luck next
time.”
“Oh wow, sorry, am I going the speed limit? Sorry if that’s
too slow for you, I know you are in a hurry. And getting up really close on my
tail like that is a good way to let me know that. But you do realize this is a
school zone, right?”
“Oh, that’s a really nice car you are driving. I can see you
like to drive fast, I probably would too if I had a car like that. Oh, oops,
gotta be careful there. Cutting off that semi probably wasn’t the best idea,
lucky there was room to get out of the way.”
“Oh sorry, I didn’t know you wanted to turn there. But next
time you could let me know, there is a little stick on your steering wheel the
turns on a neat invention called a blinker. Cool, huh?”
Ok, maybe I’m being a little harsh, but it’s all in fun. Better than yelling obscenities and flipping the bird.
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